Not gonna lie, I hit a creative block this week so here is my brain waving the white flag. Stay tuned for Stoop’s Mixtape Monday and my Exclusive interview with a former friend of Ziplok who I will be interviewing as well as a brand new video of Ziplok having a nervous breakdown and calling me out after running scared for two years. Must Read!
If you’re on twitter, often you will see corporations with verified twitter accounts run by customer service reps in order to resolve customer issues or make really corny fucking jokes. Personally, I think 90% of twitter is corny, hack, self absorbed, shit and still don’t know why I use it as much as I do. The thing is that the 10% of twitter is so damn good that it keeps me coming back. Enter Rich Hansen AKA @Digitalbees who started a Dominos Pizza twitter account by using clever spelling to troll people who tweet about Dominos Pizza. The idea worked right away with people actually arguing with the account while Rich fucking killed it with the responses. Here are some of the tweets.
I can’t imagine a girl named “StrictlyBidness” with duck lips in her twitter photo as someone who likes to tip if you know what I mean.
Dominos even made some topical humor observation when Adele was rumored to be dead. Unfortunately, she’s still alive.
LOL
My Favorite
Now for the grand Finale which is a conversation with a teenager in what might be the greatest conversation captured on the internet. 
This was easily the highlight of my weekend. If more of these troll accounts come up please send them to me or maybe just a picture of a pig pooping on it’s on balls is cool too THE REED ROTHCHILD INBOX
So how did I get Wiz Khalifa to say that Ziplok has a fancy for Pittsburgh rappers? Well, the bad news is that isn’t the real Wiz but it’s a parody account with 250k followers. The dude on twitter @boring_as_heck put me on to a service called Pay4tweets which is fucked. I had no idea that not only are people tweeting from fake accounts but have thousands of followers and are retweeting them thinking it’s them. So in a typical genius fashion, a bunch of people started fucking with the accounts making life miserable for the owners of the twitter accounts who are making money off of leasing tweets.
Trolling at it’s finest. A lot of the tweets got taken down because people were catching so much shit for some of the stuff that was tweeted to the point that they had to take them down which means they had to eventually refund money to that person. muwahaha!
Look at these beauties. 500 of them came in to H.O.R. headquarters JUST in time for the big H.O.R. Weekend. If you won’t be able to come out this weekend and would like some please email me your address and I will be glad to send some out to you for FREE. DJREEDROTHCHILD@GMAIL.COM
For those of you in DC who want some I will have fistfuls of them at all the H.O.R. events this weekend
FRIDAY: CLOCKWORK – RnR Hotel
SATURDAY: District Underground
SUNDAY: MOOMBACON MASSIVE – RnR Hotel
A lightbulb went off in my head the other day trying to figure out what happened over the last year or so as to why I wasn’t getting excited for music, any of it. Tons of good music being released, everyone going apeshit on my twitter feed about artist putting stuff out but I never checked it out. The motivation train to go out and find new music had left the station about 2 years ago. Even songs I like just didn’t do anything for me anymore. No emotion or feeling was to be found. My music soul was on life support until I figured out the problem. I don’t say anything about it promotional wise but I do top 40 gigs on Friday, sometimes Saturdays. I’ve been doing them for a good 3 years now, every week even holidays. It’s your typical top 40/college crowd that requires little to no effort to hype up if you play the easy mainstream radio shit they like. I didn’t do this post to do a DJ 101 class but you get the idea. Even tried to make things fun by dropping hype shit, throw in Bmore, top 40 electro dog shit remixes blah, blah blah.
Should have seen the train crash coming because before that I never liked to do those gigs, made me miserable. Hated that type of crowd! What happened was that my day job got cut off and I decided to do it in order to keep a cash flow goin until I found something else. At this point I was like hey, I can DJ and bring in money too, awesome. So I fucked up already because it became a money thing before a DJ thing which is cool but if you don’t enjoy what you do for a living, you’re going to eventually hate it right? Even if you enjoy what you do as a career, if you work with someone who’s a cunt, it’s going to make your job suck a little bit. In this case everyone who walked through the door was my office cunt. I know I’m going to come off as some old fart shaking his fist at the neighborhood kids bicycling by the house but the music that is put out today on a mainstream level is the most feminine, irritating, watered down shit that trumps any past generation of garbage. I haven’t exactly reinvented the wheel with that statement, music hating has gone on for decades. Rock fans hating disco, rap fans hating Country, there is something for someone to hate I know, but if you take the body of music from the past 10 years there is no doubt it’s the worst thats ever been created. The pioneers for this dog shit are the Black Eyed Peas, Pitbull, That fat non-jet skiing fuck Sean Kingston, Beyonce, etc. Music created for a demographic as opposed to music being created with a feeling or purpose.
Shit got repetitive fast. Even trying to take chances steering people in a musical direction exposing them to new music you know, eventually you would have to take it back because people are fucking dumb. I got my day job game back on track and kept spinning on the weekend in addition to running this blog, group, HOR brand, promoting for parties I’m throwing, trying to learn production, trying to get music, clownin bamas, stalking women on Facebook. Oh Football season? Give your Sundays to the Vikings while they buttfuck whatever soul left from the week. So all that and now I gotta give my weekends to ungrateful people who want to hear shit music for a few hours?
I quit. In order to love music again (the reason I got into this) I have to rid myself of bad music and I know that shit is BAD music. So for you DJ’s out there who are just coming on because you like doing what you do, my advice to you is if you want to work at places like that you can do it, but have an exit strategy. An ejection seat that you can pull the lever and sky the fuck out. One good thing that it will do is help you with your crowd awareness which is what most start up DJ’s lack. If you get diverse crowds you will learn to read them better. Honestly, if you don’t like certain music, then you’re not going to have a passion for it when you play it in front of people (sorry, DJ 101 bullshit) and a smart crowd will sense that. Luckily for me, I played in front of dumb fucks that couldn’t read the fact I want LMFAO to die in a train accident. If you want to do these gigs just so you can say you DJ plus you actually like the music, then go for it. Personally, I think you’re cornball but more power to ya.
In the meantime, I’m still going to do 2 parties, CLOCKWORK every 2nd Friday at Rock & Roll Hotel and Reed VS Reed every other 3rd Friday of the month at Little Miss Whiskeys. Those are gigs that I still have fun and enjoy working with Reed, Phil, and Will. After this H.O.R. weekend, I’m going to fall back for a while, bring back the music kid at the playground in me, reinvent the brand and bring it harder than I ever did, IF the passion is still there. If not, I’m not mad at all, it’s been an amazing 10 year run and I’ve been able to meet the best people, travel to places I would have never gone to, and see things I would have never been able to see if it wasn’t for being a DJ. For the first time in a long time, I’m really looking forward to what tomorrow brings just as long as it doesn’t involve a Pitbull hook.
I was clapped up in bed all day going through things while catching up on my Joe Rogan backlog. This one blew my mind with this guy he brought on, Peter Joseph. Peter Joseph is a film maker who also created the Zeitgeist Movement. Very interesting interview but it’s MIIND BLOWING if you watch/listen it when you’re high. Life changing.
Who knew that the most magnificent theme ever composed would be discovered on a Street Fighter game with the original Soulja Boy, Guile. Although this was a pre 9/11 world he was fighting in so I’m sure by now he’s done 4 tours, looking for work, and has post stress that could choke an elephant. The good news is that his stage theme music goes with any video on youtube. When you hear it, you feel an epic tingle of readiness while taking pride in the U.S.A. U-S-A! U-S-A!……… Don’t believe me? take the card crusher video.
Pretty boring if you ask me, even a little awkward with the silence of the TV studio. Lets Guile theme it up!
Holy Shit that was amazing. Did you see that stare down?! That’s man’s man! You get the idea, here are some of the best “Guile Theme goes with Everything” Youtubes you can find.
Those are some of my favorite ones. If you got one that I missed that needs to be shared with the world, you can embed them in the COMMENTS SECTION BELOW Until the next Guile theme Post……..
In case you were wondering why I haven’t posted up any Japanese game show vids in a while it’s because Fuji TV in Japan got hip to the fact people were posting them up on youtube and had them all taken down due to copyright policies. Sure, you can still see a few like the Human Tetris and all that but the good ones that you would have to dig around for are no longer there. VERY sad face. Good news is that in my search to find new Japan videos, I found the Japan World Cup. A series of horse races where the horses don’t actually race but have to ride things. Weird right? Here it goes.
The Animal International
I’ve been obsessed with the Joe Rogan podcasts lately especially after it put me on to Joey Karate, played by Joey Diaz.
After our first EPIC ENCOUNTER with ETA Silver G, a west coast based elvis impersonator. I knew that to be able to pull off a sequel it would take an idea so far out of left field that it would either fail miserably or he would actually be dumb enough to make it work. Going into the mission, I gave myself about a 20% chance of success. Now keep in mind that just like most sequels, the plot drastically changes, some characters return, and some don’t. Instead of luring him in like we did in the episode, this time we are taking the fight directly to him. A plan so brutal, that it single handedly throws out all the good that we did from the original post where we exposed him for the deadbeat he is. This one, is a life changer. Who would be the face that would be the bait for an operation so evil?
Swaaaaaaaag!
Met Yulovia Miswagga, Sister of one time youtube trolling sensation ULoveMySWAGGAbitch who was used originally to lure in the G-Man. She is from Victorville California, the same place Silver G grew up and where he still resides. Her current location according to Facebook is New Haven Connecticut. Why New Haven you ask? Because her occupation is director of marketing and talent hiring for the Foxwoods Casino. The Mission: To use a decoy Facebook account to make contact with Silver G and offer him a lucrative contract to perform as an Elvis Impersonator Full time at the Foxwoods Casino.
***FRIEND RQUEST SENT***
Well, that sure as shit didn’t take long. Within about 7 minutes, he accepted my friend request and cranked the creep lever on full blast via the Facebook wall. Also, he also felt obligated to let me know that he works out….
This guy makes Sandusky look like Brad Pitt. If that doesn’t gag a maggot I don’t know what will. So at this point I’m feeling pretty good about things but realistically there is no way he’s going to fall for this. I mean really? A job offer from a stranger on Facebook? So right away he hits me on Facebook chat asking me a bunch of boring ass questions. I try to advert the conversation to see if I can tell him what I do for a living. He keeps fucking rambling on about the biggest bullshit stories ever.
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We’ve already confirmed via google maps that he lives in a trailer park by a Bravo Burger and Harley Davidson dealer right off the highway. Also, he drives the same kidnapping van Tony Danza drove in “Who’s the Boss” . I’m Deeply sorry to let you down ladies, but he’s bluffing. Also loved this gem talking about these “special pics” he’s going to send over post workout…
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Cool workout, bro. This went on for a couple of days until I was finally able to tell him that I do hiring for the Foxwoods Casino and it just so happens that we are looking for Elvis Impersonators to perform on a normal basis. After I told him this, he didn’t say anything for about 45 minutes. I figured the jig was up. He comes back so excited blabbering how this is his destiny and how this came to him in a dream….. Oh, then he felt obligated…….
TO SEND ME THIS!!!!!
Great Scott, advert your eyes before they burn out of your skull! After dry heaving for about 30 minutes I got right back on topic. I then told him that In order to hire him full time he needs to make an audition video either performing or telling the Foxwoods hiring manager, Mr. Henry Reed about himself and his work experience. Once we receive the video, we can go ahead and make him an offer. Silver G was so excited, that he started posting about it all over Facebook.
Click to enlarge *Cameo by Lazerjew*
Basically, Silver thought he got the job already.
It’s getting kind of awkward now. So after going back and forth for about a week trying to get him to send over an “audition tape” I got nothing and started losing hope. I think he just wanted to brag about the possibility of playing at the Foxwoods. Finally, on a Friday morning, I open my fake email account that I gave him and BOOM, the video is ready to download. Sweet Gold. Now keep in mind before viewing this that he has no real experience at all besides playing at dive bars in Victorville. So obviously he has to stretch the truth, a LOT. Listen to the off the wall stories he comes up with. Worth watching every second. Volume is a bit low, I recommend turning the speakers up.
I wish I could’ve had a “bullshit counter” in the corner to tally up the dreck coming out of his mouth. I love how a wrecking ball was waiting to take down the Grenada theatre until Silver G in full costume, with contacts, runs down and saves the theatre like a fuckin 80′s movie. Notice he also names all the parades he’s “ATTENDED” because you know, it’s hard to be in the crowd of a parade. This is his best performance, EVER! Hmmm Silver G, the musical? I cant believe he made this. How rude of me to think that he was smart enough to be able to detect my bullshit over Facebook chat. I let the G-man know that we LOVED his audition and want to send him an offer. I drafted up an offer letter and had Denman make the proper Foxwoods letterhead. Lets just say we made him an offer he couldn’t refuse. Click Here or the picture to view the offer letter
Wow, thats a heck of an offer! Obviously, within 2 minutes he accepted. So here is the next step…
CLICK TO ENLARGE
The end is near….
Oh Jesus. So went down Friday? Well the good news is that he did get a a meeting. The bad news is that it wasn’t with Mr. Reed or Yulovia Miswagga. It was with Reed Rothchild and UloveMySwaggaBitch. At 10am Silver G went to his computer to find an email from the fake email account with the subject line of “Foxwoods Conference call number and overview” When he opened it looked like this.
“Swaaaaaaaaaaaaaaag! I can’t believe you fell for it twice. Once again, you’ve just been owned by THE HEAD OF ROTHCHILD.
Good Day
-Reed Rothchild”
It didn’t take long for Silver G to reach out to me and trust me, the G-man was in rare form just like he was last time. It’s time to bring out the Compton born, UFC fighting bad ass. I was actually shocked he found my real Facebook account.
CLICK TO ENLARGE!!!
So being the nice guy that I am, I accepted his friend request. Just to let him know that their are no hard feelings, I invited him to the debut of our New Clockwork party (EVERY SECOND FRIDAY AT ROCK & ROLL HOTEL) Couple hours later, this gem showed up in my inbox.
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It wasn’t until I was coming back from a gig Friday night that I started to get more messages from him. I got home around 7am so it was about 4am Silver time. I’m pretty sure he was shit-faced when he sent me these nuggets. One thing I remembered him telling me is that his ex-wifes name is Laura. So of course I sent him a message back saying that I was going to interview Laura on the blog. In addition, I said I was going to spin kick his head on fire in front of his family….
Strap in Kids!
and then….
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The reason I didn’t get back to the G-man is because I passed out at the crib. I felt I should respond to him because I would hate for him to think I’m a pussy…. alright, so I am a pussy BUT I gotta keep squirting gas onto the fire.
Click to enlarge!
Here we go…..
Ha! I could read these all day. If I could get 365 Silver quotes, I would make a desk calendar. Here is the last one before he blocked me and went awol.
And Scene.
So thats how it all went down. Silver Garcia went from hero to zero and thanks to the H.O.R. he’s going back up to hero status. Just to get a quick update, Silver joined a band as the lead singer. The band was called “The Crazy Boots Band, with Silver G” They had their debut gig on Halloween night at a sold out theatre venue. I shit you not. I got word from the guitarist sister that they had to cancel their appearance because Silver G never showed. Left them high and dry. The band then went their separate ways. Silver G is still property of the H.O.R. but it would take an epic plan for their to be a part 3 but you can bet dat ass I’m going to try.
